1. He makes his life meaningful and “does something great with his hands, head or heart”.
2. Helps kids as a soccer coach, Scout leader or other volunteer.
3. Tells the truth about the crash.

Many people are applauding these sentiments, but the question I ask is this: What is the cost of Unforgiveness for these parents?

Surely, forgiveness, unconditional forgiveness, is ultimately the only way for them to deal with their grief and their pain. After all, unforgiveness has a way of eating away at the soul with bitterness, resentment and goodness knows what else – I know, I speak from experience.

The poor girl that has been lost can never be replaced, but putting a price on forgiveness, however noble the sentiment, can only add to the loss and increase the hurt that is already there.

As a Christian, I know that I have been forgiven beyond measure, and knowing that forgiveness makes it a little easier for me to forgive. This appreciation of forgiveness was demonstrated in Luke’s Gospel by the sinful woman who washed Jesus’ feet with her tears and anointed them with expensive perfume. Jesus’ response: “Therefore, I tell you, her many sins have been forgiven—for she loved much. But he who has been forgiven little loves little.”

There is always a cost for forgiveness, and it may have to be a daily process at least for a time, but the cost and pain of unforgiveness costs immeasurably more.

He gives thanks.

Breaking it in two, He offers it to those gathered around.

“This is my body, given for you, do this in remembrance of me.”

Everyone eats, not really understanding.

The mood changes.

Hymns and songs of praise long forgotten.

He pours out the rich red wine into the cup.

He gives thanks.

“This cup is the new covenant in my blood, which is poured out for you.”

Everyone drinks in silence.

Betrayal and denial fill the air.

Protestations are made.

“Not me.”

“Not me.”

“Not me.”

“Not me.”

“Not me.”

One leaves into the night.

Eleven remain.

A question breaks the sombre air:

Who will be the Greatest?

“Me!”

“Me!”

“Me!”

“Me!”

“Me!”

A final hymn is sung.

The room empties.

The final Journey begins.

The Garden is silent.

Everyone is exhausted.

Asleep.

The God Man alone.

Truly alone.

“Father, if you are willing, take this cup from me

Yet not my will, but yours.”

The God Man drops to his knees.

Anguish turns to blood.

Falling to the ground.

Angelic arms reach out to strengthen Him.

Shadows move.

The silence is broken

A Kiss, not of love wounds His heart.

Scuffles and violence.

Cries of anguish

Blood is spilt.

A last miracle.

Restores.

A simple touch.

“Yet not my will, but yours.”

Everyone flees.

He is taken without a word.

Bound not in rope

But in Love.

“This is my body, given for you.”

Denials, denials, denials.

“I do not know him!”

The God Man remains silent.

Before kings and priests the Passover Lamb is prepared.

In darkness

Beaten. Tortured. Mocked.

Thorns.

A cruel crown.

The King of Kings.

“This is my body, given for you.”

“This is my blood…a new covenant…poured out for you.”

Daybreak.

A final chance.

The Governor questions.

Kingdoms clash.

Heaven and Earth.

Truth on trial.

But what is Truth?

No way out.

Appeals to the crowd.

“Barabbas! Barabbas!”

The guilty walk free.

“Crucify! Crucify! Crucify!”

Injustice for undeserved Justice.

The Passover Lamb is prepared.

Flesh is torn.

“This is my body, given for you.”

“This is my blood…a new covenant…poured out for you.”

Disfigured, barely alive, the God Man stumbles.

The Cross weighs down.

A crushing burden, impossibly heavy.

Respite as hands take hold.

Wailing and tears echo as he climbs the hill.

“Yet not my will, but yours.”

Callous nails await atop the giant Skull.

The hammer blows ring out.

Bang. [sound effect of a hammer and chisel]

“This is my body…”

Bang.

“Given for you.”

Bang.

“A new covenant”

Bang.

“In my blood”

Bang.

“Poured out for you…poured out for you.”

The King of Glory.

Hoisted high.

“He saved others, let him save himself!”

The King of the Jews.

Dice rolls in a game of chance.

The plea of a thief.

“Jesus, remember me when you come into your kingdom.”

“I tell you the truth, today you will be with me in paradise.”

Love hangs His head

The noon day sky darkens to shades of night.

One hour…

Two hours…

Three hours…

“Father, forgive them, they know not what they do.”

“It…

is…

finished.”

A cold spear thrust.

A flow of blood and water.

The Creator is dead.

The Veil.

Torn in two.

The Holy of Holies.

Open for all.

God unleashed.

Darkness falls over a borrowed tomb.

A heavy stone.

A dead King.

It is finished…

After a brilliant day we drove back, we me saying on a number of occasions what a real blessing the day was – I was beaming! Then back home, Catrin was lying on the sofa just gazing up at me and smiling in the way that only a 7 month old can. How beautiful she looked – even though she never did the activities, she obviously had a great day too! As she beamed at me, I as her Dad couldn’t help beaming back at her! It reminded me of something that Liz had said as we were driving back, that seeing Seren enjoying herself was better than any activity we could have done ourselves – I whole-heartedly agreed! So, as Catrin beamed up at me, how could I not smile back? Life can be so wonderful, filled with precious moments! Then it occurred to me, when I was laughing and thinking how blessed I was at having such a brilliant day at Heatherton Park, no doubt my Heavenly Father was beaming too!

During his time as God’s servant, I occasionally accompanied John as he tirelessly worked in schools throughout the Rhondda Valleys, preaching the Good News in a way that only he could, with great warmth, humour, passion and love, his big voice booming out, filling any size room without the aid of a microphone!

Which reminds me of another John…

John the Baptist, ‘a voice calling out in the desert’ for the people to return to God. Two thousand years later, John Griffiths was another voice, this time ‘a voice calling out in the Valleys’, and you can be sure that thousands heard his booming voice, crying out wherever he went of the people’s need for a Saviour.

Just like his famous predecessor, John was uncompromising in his faith, preaching the Gospel fearlessly and calling for everyone to turn to Jesus. I can only guess at the hundreds, if not thousands of souls who will be joining John in Glory because of his wonderful message, where even at this moment, Jesus is welcoming John Griffiths with arms spread wide and a beaming smile with the magnificent words: “Well done, good and faithful servant…”

It is a well known fact that John often walked the streets telling the people about Jesus, so perhaps it is rather fitting that God took him to his eternal home while he was out walking the streets he loved so much.

There will only ever be one John Griffiths – a true one-off who will be sorely missed by everyone.

For me personally, John was a great friend and a true inspiration – I will miss him.

Our prayers of comfort go out to all his family.

God isn’t sitting in the Heavenly realms wanting us live miserable lives, in fact it’s just the opposite, He wants us to have life in all its fullness (John 10:10). This fullness comes from us being in a fullness of relationship with Him, so that whatever we are doing, we can do it with joyful hearts, knowing that ultimately, we are in His service. Paul sums this up in Colossians 3:23-24:

“Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for men, since you know that you will receive an inheritance from the Lord as a reward. It is the Lord Christ you are serving.”

When God sees the joy in our hearts, it fills Him with joy too. He knows the Joy of Creating – just look at the wonders of the universe all around – God just loves to create and when He does, He creates beautiful and wondrous things, you and me included! Joy is a wonderful, it bubbles up and overflows beyond our lives and into the lives of others, simply because Joy reflects a huge aspect of who God is – a God of Joy and a God of Peace.

The Joy of Creation is a wonderful thing! As we are made in God’s image, we too have the gift of creation, which takes us back to the things we like doing. There are many things that we love to do that we aren’t necessarily good at, but still we struggle on, partly because of the enjoyment it brings and partly because we hope to get better over time – for me, this is where my dire attempts at golf spring to mind…

Yet, God has given every one of us special gifts and talents, things that we not only like doing, but those special things that we are also very good at! Max Lucardo calls this our ‘Sweet Spot’, where everything comes together and time passes by effortlessly.

As a professional coach, I find that this is often the key to unlocking a person’s potential, uncovering the things in people’s lives that they are not only good at, but also that they enjoy. This is the Joy of the creator at its very highest, not only finding joy in the mundane tasks of life, but the indescribable joy when everything clicks together and in our hearts we can say: ‘I was made for this…’

So, if you find yourself stuck in a rut, why not take some time out to reflect on the gifts that God has given you, particularly the things that you are naturally good at and enjoy. Then deliberately plan to take some time out from the everyday mundane and focus on the things that God gave you a special gifting for. The Joy of the Creator will shine in you, and who knows, may well spill over and give you joy in all the other things too!

Anyway, as we sat down to eat, with all the delicious food set before us, I had decided to forgo ‘saying grace’ for two reasons. Firstly, everyone seemed eager to tuck in (it was nearly quarter past two after all), and secondly, because my friends are non-believers I didn’t want to possibly embarrass and delay them with a prayer of blessing. Then, at the last moment, there seemed to be the slightest of pauses, so I just said, “Thank you, Lord, for this food” and then everyone tucked in.

On reflection, maybe I missed out on an opportunity. Not only to show our friends that Jesus is an integral part of our lives and being thankful for His provision in the everyday things that we take for granted, but more importantly, maybe I missed an opportunity for them to experience something God’s Blessing for themselves.

Believers or not, there are so many things that we take for granted. As Christians, we know that all good things ultimately come from God, so maybe thanking Him not only for the food, but also taking the opportunity to thank Him for our friendships and what they mean to us, would not have been an embarrassment or an awkward silence, but maybe, the richest blessing for all!

Where did it all go wrong?

We were children once…I can remember each of us as youngsters in the playground discussing the ever popular: “When I grow up I’m going to be…” Then the excitement would begin as we listed the endless possibilities: “…a fireman”, “…a doctor”, “…a nurse”, “…a teacher”, “…a policeman”, or for the more adventurous, “…a secret agent”, “…an astronaut!”

In those days of unbridled innocence and optimism who would have thought that some of the answers could well end up being: “…depressed”, “…divorced”, “…a single parent”, “…unemployed”, “…a drug addict”, “…suicidal”, “…a prostitute”, “…unhappy and alone”.

Where did we lose our way?

Somewhere along the journey from childhood to adulthood we stumbled from the paths of optimism and gaiety into the darkness of grown-up reality. You don’t believe me? Just look at the way in which we view at children, almost incredulous at times, as if their thought processes, actions and attitudes are completely alien to us, and that we had never experienced being a child for ourselves. Or could it be that in the rush and ambition of wanting to be a grown-up, we merely forgot?

The other week we went up to Hay on Wye and found ourselves in a children’s bookshop with every children’s book imaginable from our forgotten childhoods sitting there on the shelves: The Secret Seven, The Famous Five, Peter Rabbit, Jemima Puddleduck, Agaton Sax, Roald Dahl books, Ladybird books, Penguin Books. These treasured books, once only costing a few pence are now worth up to several hundred pounds (particularly if they have the original dust cover). Just a cursory glance will tell you that most of the people in the shop are not children, but adults, their eyes shining as they look for something they have lost, not merely an old book, but something far more valuable, their lost childhood…

A 4×4 parked just 10 or 12 feet in front started rolling back towards me! I could only look on in horror as the car rolled and slid into mine – the 4×4′s owner running helplessly after it! Upon the inevitable collision, the 4×4 played car ping-pong as it slid down the road and hit yet another parked car, while mine pirouetted gracefully on the snowy surface, fortunately managing to avoid other vehicles. The owner approached with his arms in the air, saying over and over: “It’s an act of God, it’s an act of God…” Well, God sure does move in some mysterious ways sometimes, but as for this one, I decided to let the insurance companies sort it out…

But the whole thing sort of get’s you thinking…when accidents happen, are they ‘acts of God’ or maybe even because God simply doesn’t care. Looking at the tragedies that happen every day around the world, it is easy for someone who doesn’t believe or understand God (and I’m not saying that I as a Christian do – “Who has understood the mind of the LORD…” Isaiah 40:13; “For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways,” declares the LORD. ”As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts.” Isaiah 55:8-9), it can seem that God (if there is one) is both distant and remote, not really caring what happens to individuals or what is happening in their lives. But is this really the case?

I believe that God is passionate about this broken world that we live in and passionate about each and every individual in it, we are after all His children, and though there are many families and children who have been abandoned by their fathers, our heavenly Father will never abandon us. How do I know this in view of all the overwhelming evidence to the contrary? The answer is simple. It all comes down to Jesus. Jesus came to put things right – Jesus, the very Son of God, and yet peculiarly, also God Himself, was sent into the world to put the brokenness right – He came and died wilfully for us as the Ultimate Act of God – “He [Jesus] was in the world, and though the world was made through him, the world did not recognise him. He came to that which was his own, but his own did not receive him. Yet to all who received him, to those who believed in his name, he gave the right to become children of God.” John 1:10-12; and in the words of Jesus (God) Himself: “For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life.” John 3:16.

God is involved actively in His Creation – He always has been and He always will be. Accidents do happen, but before blaming God, maybe we should look a little deeper and ponder what is the real cause, could the accident have been avoided, and what can we learn through it. Now, where did I put my insurance certificate…

As Garcia (Sergio not Andy) reached the 18th, he needed just one putt to win the title – the TV cut to the engraver of the fabled Claret Jug poised to etch his name on the trophy as he was poised to make the final putt, but alas, it was never to be…

For all the excitement and intrigue of the 2007 Open Championship, it all starts again for 2008! When it was all over I was thrilled for Padraig and devastated for Sergio; but then strangely, I was left feeling rather empty and unfulfilled. After all, in the greater scheme of things, it was only a game of golf where the ultimate reward (besides the £750,000 prize money), was to get your name engraved along with 135 others on a piece of silverware.

Is it that important? Maybe; maybe not.

There’s always next year’s Open to look for to; and the one after that; and the one after that…

I wonder how Padraig and Sergio will feel ten years from now – will they still be feeling elated or devastated or won’t it matter.

Often reaching our goals and achievements has it’s moments of euphoria but it all soon melts away and there is something else to achieve; another goal to obtain.

I, as a Christian have to live with the fact that I might never achieve greatness in the eyes of the world; and yet I am told in the Bible that my name is written in the Book of Life (along with countless other millions of Believers). I wonder, am I really appreciative of that fact? Do I live my life with a Heavenly perspective where I am continually ‘Lost in wonder, love and praise’ at the full realisation of what Christ has done for me, and what awaits me in Heaven?

Or will Heaven be one big disappointment?

I think not!

Billy Graham once said: “I expect to be living with God a thousand years from today. One million years from now, I expect to be more alive than I am today. Why? Because I am a partaker of His [Jesus] eternal life.”

By which time, people will be watching the 1,000,136 Open; but somehow I think not…

Heaven and Earth at some time will pass away, of that I am sure, taking with it the fabled Claret Jug and along with it, all memories of one of the most memorable Open Championships of all time, but from my Heavenly perspective in Eternity I doubt that I will be too disappointed…

This was one of those key moments – would I become less so that Christ would become more? Could I overcome perhaps one of the greatest barriers to reconciliation, my pride and admit that I was wrong and apologise. Well, thankfully yes I did, but even though I knew this was the right thing to do, it still was far from easy, even though my wife was very gracious and loving in her response.

An old friend of mine who was married for 54 years offered this advice before I got married: “Always be the first to say ‘Sorry’, even if you know that you’re not wrong!” The Bible has a similar verse “In your anger do not sin: Do not let the sun go down while you are still angry, and do not give the devil a foothold.” Ephesians 4:26-27. This makes fantastic sense before pride steps in!

The truth is, it is very hard to say sorry even when we’re wrong but even more so if we think that we are in the right. It takes great courage and humility to say sorry in either case, particularly the latter, which allows the other person to save face.

In my own recent experience, I would like to think that “I became less and Christ became more”, but it got me thinking:

Did Jesus ever say sorry?

We always think of Jesus as without sin, which is perfectly correct, but did he ever say sorry

• To allow someone to save face – can it really be counted a sin to ‘let someone off the hook’? Surely this is more an act of grace?
• Maybe when he was learning to be a carpenter and messing up a job.
• After his parents found him teaching in the Temple when he was twelve without telling them (Luke 41-51).

Whatever the case, I am not suggesting for one instant that Our Saviour sinned, I am merely pondering how maybe we view and limit Jesus never imagining him in the everyday situations outside those reported in the Gospels; situations that you and I face each and every day.